I’ve been wondering lately if my bipolar 2 treatment is actually helping, or if I’m just getting better at hiding how bad I feel. My lows aren’t quite as crushing as they used to be, but I still lose whole stretches of time to exhaustion, irritability, and not wanting to deal with anyone. Then I’ll have a few days where I feel unusually productive and hopeful, and I start questioning whether the medication is doing something or whether I’m just cycling again.
The frustrating part is that there isn’t one dramatic change I can point to. It’s more like tiny improvements mixed in with the same old problems. I’m tracking sleep and mood, but sometimes that just makes me stare at the pattern and worry more.
I don’t want to stop treatment impulsively, especially since things could be worse without it. I think I need to bring this up more clearly with my prescriber instead of saying I’m “doing okay” because I’m not in an obvious crisis. Is it normal for treatment to help a little without making the depression feel manageable?