I’ve been trying to stop anxiety from calling the shots with my compulsions. The hard part is that doing the compulsion gives me a few minutes of relief, so my brain treats it like proof that I needed to do it.
Lately I’ve been practicing waiting before I act, even if it’s only five minutes. The anxiety gets louder at first, but sometimes it drops on its own. It’s uncomfortable, but I’m starting to see that I don’t have to fix every scary thought right away.
Still working on it. Some days are much harder than others.
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That five-minute pause sounds like a really useful practice. I’ve noticed the relief from a compulsion can be so convincing, even when it fades quickly and leaves the anxiety waiting for the next round.
The part about not fixing every scary thought right away really matters. I’m trying to remind myself that discomfort can pass without me doing anything to make it go away. Some days I can hold off longer, and other days I just start again with a smaller goal.
@Charles_Gonzales, the relief after a compulsion can feel like such convincing evidence, even though it usually just teaches the anxiety to come back louder. The five-minute wait is a solid way to test that pattern without demanding perfection.
What helped me was setting a timer and deciding that I only had to postpone the compulsion until it rang. I’d rate the urge before and after, and sometimes it had dropped enough that waiting another few minutes felt possible. On harder days, getting through even one minute still counted.
That part where the anxiety gets louder before it settles is so hard, but it’s also useful information. I’ve had urges feel almost urgent, then noticed they weren’t quite as powerful after a short wait.
On rough days, I try not to turn the five minutes into a test I can fail. Even delaying for a minute or two gives me a chance to see the urge as an urge, instead of an instruction. Repeating that when I can has helped me trust the feeling a little less.