Postpartum psychosis and what it felt like for me

I wonder if anyone else has experienced that surreal moment when you realize something isn’t quite right after having a baby. It’s a mix of beauty and chaos, right? I mean, we all talk about the overwhelming love you feel, but there’s this flip side that rarely gets mentioned.

After my little one arrived, I started to notice these strange thoughts creeping in. At first, I brushed them off, thinking it was just the sleep deprivation talking. I mean, who doesn’t have wild ideas when they’re up at 3 AM, right? But then, it got weirder. I’d be sitting there, cradling my baby, feeling this intense fear that something terrible was about to happen—like a dark cloud hovering just out of sight. It’s hard to put that into words.

There were moments when I’d have these vivid delusions. I remember being convinced that I needed to protect my baby from someone who wasn’t even there. That feeling of paranoia, it was so unsettling. It’s like being trapped in your own mind, where everything feels so real, yet you know on some level it isn’t.

When I finally reached out for help, I was terrified. I didn’t want to be seen as a bad mother or someone who couldn’t handle the emotional rollercoaster of new motherhood. But the relief that came with sharing my experience was incredible. It’s almost like taking a deep breath after holding it for too long. I learned that postpartum psychosis is more common than many realize, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of.

Talking to others who faced similar issues has been really grounding for me. If you or someone you know has gone through this, I’d love to hear your story. It’s so important to create a space where we can share without judgment. After all, we’re all just trying to navigate this wild journey of motherhood together, right?