I’ve been struggling with rumination eating disorder for a while now, and it’s really taking a toll on me. It’s made life very difficult in so many ways - from simple tasks like eating out to worrying about what other people think when they see me.
What I find most frustrating is that I can’t seem to get out of my own head and focus on the task at hand. My thoughts keep returning to the disorder, making it impossible to put aside all of the anxiety and worry associated with it.
I’ve been trying various treatments, like therapy and medication, but still feel overwhelmed by this overwhelming sense of dread whenever I have to face a meal. It’s always a struggle to eat what I should be eating and not go into rumination mode regarding my food choices.
It feels really isolating sometimes because there’s not a lot of understanding or knowledge about this disorder. Many just don’t understand how it works or its effects on everyday life - something that makes finding support even more difficult.
But I’m determined to find ways to manage this disorder and live without any fear or judgment around food or nutrition, as well as getting better support when needed. There is hope in overcoming these struggles, however long and exhausting the process may seem right now.