My mild OCD story might not be as severe as some, but it still has a huge effect on my life. I’ve had obsessive-compulsive tendencies since high school, but it was easy to manage at that time. Only recently have I noticed that my compulsions are taking over more of my life and causing me distress.
It started with just wanting everything to be neat and tidy. Whether I’m cleaning the house or organizing items in my purse, if it’s not done properly and symmetrically, I can’t stop obsessing over it. Even now if something isn’t “just right” I will keep adjusting until it meets my own standards of perfection.
Another obsession of mine is constantly washing my hands every few minutes when I’m out and about. It doesn’t matter how many times I wash them, it just feels like they’re never really clean no matter what kind of soap I use or for however long I lather up for!
One thing that has been particularly difficult for me is dealing with the idea of germs or unknown contaminants in places that are considered public and therefore full of bacteria. Things like door handles or seats on public transportation feel impossible to touch without feeling overwhelmed by a sense of contamination and distress. To make matters worse, this fear has extended to anything touched by strangers; even something as simple as loan money from someone else can give me anxiety due to potential cooties they may possess!
I wish there was an easy solution to managing these irrational fears so that my life could go back to being normal again, but unfortunately living with OCD means learning to live with anxiety each day and trying your best to fight against any irrational thoughts or compulsions that arise.