I can’t say that I knew for sure I was dealing with borderline depression until recently. For some time, I’ve just felt like something had been off. It was a familiar feeling, one that seemed to come and go, but it never quite went away completely.
I was scared to explore what was really going on inside me at first. I told myself it was nothing and pushed down any feelings of sadness or anxiety. It kept getting harder to ignore the signs as things around me seemed to be constantly changing. That led me to seek out help from a professional who could give me insight into my thoughts and behaviors.
It was hard work both in therapy and facing the difficult emotions that came with examining my life more deeply. I wrote about my experiences, keeping a journal and seeking out other ways to express how difficult this process can be.
Eventually, I accepted that using the word “depression” did not make me weak. In fact, acknowledging the reality has made me so much stronger! Nowadays, I feel better equipped to handle whatever comes my way because I know when a wave of emotions arrive-- whether good or bad --I can get through them. Being honest with myself has allowed me to fully understand my mental health needs which makes living my best life much easier than before!