Having struggled with mental health issues for a majority of my life, I have become painfully familiar with compulsive behaviors. What started out as just moving fingers in a certain way to help me focus during stressful moments quickly evolved into much more time consuming and socially unacceptable actions.
At first, I was embarrassed and tried desperately to hide the behavior from my friends and family. I feared judgment from them if they knew what I was dealing with, so I put on a “brave face” each day and silently suffered through it alone. However, this only added to the problem as repressing my feelings confused me even more. Over time, I found myself relying more on my behavioral crutches for comfort when stuck in difficult situations.
The realization that these behaviors had to be addressed in order for me to start healing felt daunting at first - but now I can look back and be proud that I chose to face this challenge head-on instead of ignoring it forever. Through talk therapy with compassionate professionals, medication adjustments, and self-education about mindfulness practices - I began learning how to break free from the grip these unhealthy habits had on my life.
Although there are still hard days here and there when negative impulses come into play – overall this journey has ultimately shown me strength, resilience and personal motivation that has helped shape who I am today. My advice for anyone struggling is: you are not alone; recovery is possible; never give up on yourself!